For lease: One small, 3"x3"x1.37" blue "Tiffany & Co." jewelry box with suede pouch.
Upgrade any sterling jewelry instantly with this iconic blue box—she'll think you shopped at Tiffany's and you'll get a significant savings. Double bonus points!
For only seven dollars a week* (plus round-trip shipping), you can lease this beautiful blue box, its pouch and the original padding. That's only a dollar a day! (Return in mint condition at the end of your lease to have your $55 deposit fee refunded.) Please note that you may need multiple weeks to sneak the box back from your wife.
*Offer good only until the original contents are paid off.
Note to trolling lawyers: This blog posting is a spoof. A funny one, but not one I expect to be taken seriously! If you insist that I take it down, I'll consider your argument below in the comments. But I think I'm covered under the "parody is free speech" stuff. (By the way, my relatives all thought this is how I got the box in the first place—I have a receipt around here somewhere. . . .)
